Chao World: A Story
by Darkness The Hedgehog
Summary: The story of chao and the people who raise them. I attept to make it humour. Please R&R.
1. Tails, Sonic, Bolt and Scarlet

Chao World: A Story  
By Darkness The Hedgehog  
  
[A/N: I know having random characters taking care of Chao isn't a new concept for fanfiction, nor is having Omochao be really annoying, but I like to think that this is different for several reasons: a) I will try to make this fic a bit less random than the previous ones b) It has non-Sonic characters making cameos, and even raising Chao c) this fic will often be in Diary format. In other words, it will go day by day. Now sit back, R & R, and enjoy the fic... right after my stupid disclaimer.]  
  
Mr. Disclaimer, who is really a poorly disguised Eggman, says: Hey kids! Don't get severely drunk, do drugs OR attempt to take over a world where humanoid hedgehog-mutants can run faster than the speed of sound! It's impossible, I tell you!... AHEM! Anyway, Darkness doesn't own Sonic or Sega. He is in no way affiliated with them. All other characters used in this fic, other than a few that may be mentioned like Sunburn and Darkness, are also not owned by Darkness.  
  
And now, Chapter 1:  
  
Day 1: Sonic's POV:  
  
Damn You Diary,  
  
Tails woke me up at 1 AM because of some bad dream about man-eating tuna- fish sandwiches. You'd think a child genius could just freakin' figure out on his own that giant man-eating sandwiches aren't going to devour him in his sleep, but NOOOOOOOOOO! I had to spend until 2 AM patting him on the back and reassuring him that "No, the tuna fish sandwiches don't actually exist." Damnit, sometimes I wish one of those damn giant man-eating tuna- fish sandwiches in the fridge would just eat that mutant. I'm going back to sleep.  
  
Annoyed,  
  
Sonic the Hedgehog  
  
...DAMNIT! I couldn't get to sleep. It's 4 AM. Tails was screaming in his sleep about those stupid sandwiches again. I think one of them might have actually escaped the fridge. Tails ruffed up a bit when I checked on him. I looked around, but I think it's hiding somewhere in the house. I only have one option left. If I want to get any sleep at all, we'll have to go somewhere else where Tails won't be afraid to sleep. We're going to Chao World. And I thought I'd escaped that moron Omochao...  
  
Well, we're here. Tails fell asleep after checking around to see if the sandwich followed us. I'm going to sleep now.  
  
Sleepily,  
  
Sonic the Hedgehog  
  
...I hate my life. It's 6 AM, and I'm awake again. Tails is fine this time, but guess what? There are CHAO in Chao World! Of all the luck... Long story short, I rolled over on an egg in my sleep and ended up incubating it. It hatched, and I was still on top of the Chao. It started crying and punching me and woke me up. I threw it off into the lake so it would stop bothering me, but It turns out Chao aren't born with the ability to swim. I had to save it. Then it started begging for food, and it chewed on my arm for a while so I shook a tree and gave 'im the fruit. The strange thing is that even though Chao raised by heroes are supposed to turn white, mines been turning a bit dark ever since the lake incident... I wonder why? Oh well, back to sleep...  
  
Tails's POV:  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
It's 9 AM. Ever since we escaped that food-infested house I've been feeling A LOT better. It looks like Sonic hatched a Chao overnight. It was sleeping beside him when I woke up. Beats me why it's turning into a Dark Chao though. Knowing Sonic he probably whacked it for waking him up. He isn't a morning person. Well, there's no food around here except the stuff in the trees, and I can't tell if it' a fruit or a nut. I searched around the Chao Kindergarten and the Black Market. Nothing looked appetizing, although I considered making a Red Chao Egg Omelette, but I decided against it in the end. Unfortunately, I'd already bought it. I went back to the Chao Garden and ate some of the disgusting fruits. I spent a few hours trying to hatch the egg. I soaked it in the waterfall, hit it with my tails, I bit it, cooked it up a bit, and created various inventions out of rocks and tree bark, but nothing worked. Funny thing is, after I gave up, it hatched on its own. It's a female, and it's really cute looking. When Sonic and his Chao woke up, my chao immediately began playing with Sonic's. Sonic has decided to name his Chao Bolt. I named mine Scarlet. I suggested that Sonic and me move here. Sonic agreed, "just 'cause it's nice and quiet, then he mumbled something about sleep and went off to have a nap. This is gonna' be INTERESTING, to say the least. Wait, was that a sandwich behind that rock? Well, gotta' go!...ARG! It's eating my spleen!  
  
In Great Pain,  
  
Tails 


	2. Eggman's Entrance, Plot Development, And...

Chao World: A Story  
By Darkness The Hedgehog  
  
Mr. Disclaimer, who is really a poorly disguised Eggman, says: Hey kids! Don't get severely drunk, do drugs OR attempt to take over a world where humanoid hedgehog-mutants can run faster than the speed of sound! It's impossible, I tell you!... AHEM! Anyway, Darkness doesn't own Sonic or Sega. He is in no way affiliated with them. All other characters used in this fic, other than a few that may be mentioned like Sunburn and Darkness, are also not owned by Darkness.  
  
And now, Chapter 2:  
  
Day 2: Eggman's POV:  
  
Dear Evil Journal,  
  
I have finally come up with the perfect plan... At least I HOPE It's perfect. After all, Omochao inspired it. Earlier today (It is 12 AM as I write this) he crashed into my head. He said he was "going to get some cream puffs from Yugoslavia". Sometimes I wonder about him. But anyway, that's when I realised my plan: If one idiotic robot Chao can give me a bump on my head, think how much damage an army of non- idiotic, non-robot Chao could do! Yes, that's right, an ARMY OF MALEVOLENT CHAO! And no one could bear to hit a cute little Chao. Mwahahahahahahaha! But I digress, I'm packing some weapons and heading to Chao World.  
  
I'm here. It's shortly after 1 PM. After searching several hours I was unable to find a Chao Egg. And then I saw them. Sonic and Tails were playing with some baby Chao. Tails had a Red one that was turning into a hero-type I think (It's hard to tell with monotone Chao), and Sonic's was normal coloured and sort of dark in comparison. Sonic probably whacked it when it woke him up. He's not a morning person. Anyway, I didn't want to risk spoiling my cover, so I sent in Omochao (who was in my weapons case for some strange reason) to distract them. Meanwhile I searched the bushes, and after hours of searching (and Omochao landing on my head), found an egg in the lake. I took the easy route in hatching it: I threw it against the wall. It came out with a bizarre squiggly mouth. I named him Eggbert, and tried to subjugate him, but he kept whining and crying, and he didn't seem to be paying any attention to me, so I shook a tree for some of the hard fruits. If I couldn't use logic to rule over these creatures, force would do. But as I raised the fruit to throw it at Eggbert, he immediately stared at me and begged. These creatures were totally captivated by food! I held the food while lecturing him, and he at least seemed to get the picture: listen to me and you get the fruit. I gave him it. He then began crawling around aimlessly. Chao couldn't walk immediately after birth? No one would fear a little creature slowly crawling after them! My mission became clear: Find some way to power these Chao enough to walk erect at least. Then I would try to move on to flying, and then THE WORLD WLL BE MINE! Mwahahahahahaha...  
  
Diabolically,  
  
Doctor Ivo 'Eggman' Robotnik  
  
Tails' POV:  
  
Dear Diary,  
  
I survived the night, and although Sonic hasn't been able to make Bolt any more heroic (which wasn't helped by the fact that Sonic has been dropping him a lot), Scarlet is quickly becoming kind and nice... to me. She's been pouncing on Sonic and hitting him, but that's another story. Anyway, after several failed attempts by Sonic to make Bolt run faster, I came up with an idea: what if there was some sort of power source that would make Chao more powerful, like a Chao's version of Chaos Emeralds. I went over to Angel Island, but Knuckles refused to lend me his emeralds. He's such a moron. When I came back, Omochao was buzzing around Sonic telling him things like "don't fall into bottomless pits, they're BAD!" Sonic and me threw him into the bushes randomly, and I swear I heard someone say "Ow!" Maybe the sandwich is back again! O_O NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!... Anyway, I left Sonic to take care of my Chao and went looking for alternative power sources. I was scouting Eggman's poorly hidden Egg Pyramid and destroying robots when I noticed something: they were powered by animals! I brought a few peacocks back to Chao World. When I got there, Scarlet was neutral again. Sonic said it wasn't his fault, and Sonic always tells the truth. I suspect the sandwich. I briefed Sonic on my plan to use animals, and he said he'd have to see it to believe it. I asked if he'd bet 500 rings on it, and he agreed. Surely enough, when I gave Scarlet the peacocks, she got a feathered tail and small wings. Sonic forked over the rings. Heh. Sucker. Sonic's ran off to get some baby cheetahs or something. It's currently 5 PM.  
  
Happily,  
  
Tails  
  
Sonic's POV:  
  
DAMNIT DIARY I HATE YOU!  
  
It's 7 PM. I just got back from being mauled by a mother cheetah when I tried to take some of her babies to give Bolt. I knew I should have just gone with my plan to get some from that crappy Egg Pyramid. Anyway, after I got some cheetahs I came back and Tails made a wound-healing gadget out of tree bark and rocks, which set me on fire. I hate Tails' stupid gadgets. Why didn't he just bring some frikkin' tools and METAL with him?! Well, Bolt is a bit faster now, at least. Is still can't believe I'm out of rings. Damn mutant fox.  
  
Cursedly,  
  
Sonic the Hedgehog  
  
[A/N: Sorry this isn't nearly as funny as the last one (in my opinion), but It's hard not being random, and after that comment I got for A Self- Insertion Into The Insane, I am sincerely attempting to show more un-random humour. Please R&R, and tell me if I should be more random in this fic or not, or if I should just entirely quit it. Even flames about crappy quality of this fic will be appreciated. And also, tell me if you like diary-format or not, and if not what format I should use for this story.] 


End file.
